Something I've Noticed

While others are descending into the black, California is coming alive my friends. The state that is notorious for being objective to Christ, is waking up and embracing the true rebellion that's in Jesus Christ.

I...

will never find a wife. Sorry Mom.

...

If a rubix cube had a face, i would punch it

Prayer of Monday #2

Hallelujah

Disney "Princesses"

Jasmine - Too whiney

Ariel - Fine when she can't talk

Snow White - Good at cleaning...not so good at singing

Cinderella - Great until the Godmother screwed everything up

Belle - Perfect except she reads...haha women reading

Sleeping Beauty - Wonderful...when she's asleep

My Bucket-List (a working progress)

1.) Eat Fish n' Chips in England
2.) Travel Europe
3.) Be a part of a bar fight
4.) Witness 3 sunsets in one night
5.) Kill a man...na just kidding
5.) Acquire super powers
6.) Help Ireland regain their status of being the #1 missionary send out country in the world
7.) Go to a real football game

U2

One of the world's leading voices of faith and social activism also happens to be one of the greatest rock bands in history. The Dublin-rooted band has sold over 145 million albums worldwide and has won 22 Grammy awards (more than any other band). The members of the band drink, smoke, and swear- yet a radical biblical agenda and faith fuel their lives and work. Throughout their career, as a band and as individuals, they have campaigned for human rights and social justice causes, including Amnesty International, the ONE Campaign, and Bono's DATA (Debt, AIDS, Trade in Africa) campaign. They have spoken in front of presidents, prime ministers, and the pope. What drives these four individuals? How is it that one of Christianity's leading voices for Christ are shunned by the churches? This paper will explore the spiritual journey that these Ireland boys have been on, exploring the true meanings of songs like “Mysterious Ways” and “I Still Haven't Found.” This is a dichotomy of the U2’s spiritual beginnings.

Boy
In all reality, Ireland is the last place anyone would have guessed that a band like U2 would have come out of. At the time of their beginning, Ireland was a musical-starved wasteland. Yet, somehow in the midst of the rock n' roll “drought,” came forth one of the most needed voice in our current day of age. U2, composed of Paul “Bono” Hewson (vocals and guitar), David “the Edge” Evans (guitar, keyboards, and vocals), Adam Clayton (bass guitar) and Larry Mullen, Jr. (drums and percussion), formed together in 1976 when they were mere teenagers with a very limited knowledge of music. However, by the early nineties, the band had already developed an early part of their sound.

The music that the band made was rare at that time for four guys from Dublin but, what was even more extraordinary was their faith. Almost a century before, Ireland was won of the greatest missionary-sending countries. But, within the last hundred years the country's (along with the rest of western Europe) faith has dwindled to the point of extinction. War and terrorism have been and are currently taking place between Catholic and Christian. The civil war within the Christian community has become as bad as a gang war. So to have a band like U2 come from an area where Christianity is thought the same of as a gang, is unfathomable. A little over a year into their musical career during a tour in England, Bono wrote to his father a letter explaining the beliefs of the band,

“You should be aware that at the moment three of the group are committed Christians. That means offering each day up to God, meeting in the morning for prayers, readings, and letting God work in our lives. This gives us the strength and joy that does not depend on drink or drugs. This strength will, I believe, be the quality that will take us to the top of the music business where never before have so many lost and sorrowful people gathered in one place pretending they're having a good time. It is our ambition to make more than good music.1”

U2's debut album was Boy (1980), which rang out with originality. The album was built around Edge's ringing guitar and was the sound that they began to build off of throughout their career. Boy was full of vibrancy, passion, and life. It had a sense of a searching adolescence that Bono's lyrics tried to wrestle with that would continue throughout their music and even with their newest album No Line on the Horizon (2009). Bono remarked that “Twighlight” was “about the gray area of adolescence, that twighlight zone where the boy that was, confronts the man to be in the shadows. It is about confusion, pain, and occasional exhilaration that results from confrontation.2” That’s what Boy was about and if ever a guitarist could take that sentiment and project it through an amplifier, it was The Edge.

The lyrics of the album are full of an honesty that would continue throughout Bono's career. The sincerity of Boy was extremely endearing. Whether it was dealing with suicide on “A Day Without Me” and seeing his own ego being surrendered, or a youthful dreaming of stardom and changing the world in “The Ocean,” or confronting his mother's death in “I Will Follow,” Bono was dealing with his world face to face. Looking life in the eye would become the trademark of his songwriting.

“I Will Follow” is perhaps the song that best touches the band's faith on Boy. Bono uses a phrase from Christ's parable of the prodigal son, whose father told him he was lost and now is found. Bono was interweaving the loss of his mother and finding God through the lyrics of the song. It's a song about adolescent tragedy as well as discipleship, skillfully disguised but just as clear, which would become another trademark of U2.

Rock n' roll usually comes from a rebellion. U2's rebellion was their faith-not their rock n' roll lifestyle. In 1983, Bono told Rolling Stone: “I think that, ultimately, the group is totally rebellious because of our stance against what people accept as rebellion. The whole thing about rock stars driving cars into swimming pools-that's not rebellion...Rebellion starts at home, in your heart, in your refusal to compromise your beliefs and your values. I'm not interested in politics like people fighting back with sticks and stones, but in the politics of love.3” For U2, it was more rebellious to read the Bible than to do drugs-a look on Christianity which was not normal for the culture in which they emerged. However, being from a place where “following Christ” was an idea almost gone helped the members grasp a radical faith in following Jesus. “I have this hunger in me...everywhere I look, I see the evidence of a Creator. But I don't see it as religion, which has cut my people in two. I don't see Jesus Christ as being any part of a religion. Religion to me is almost like when God leaves-and people devise a set of rules to fill the space.4”

October
No other U2 album was more obvious of a confession of faith than October (1981). With songs like “Gloria” and “Rejoice” and mentions of the cross in “Tomorrow” and “With a Shout (Jerusalem)” the songs dig deep into the roots of what it means to be a Christian and focus upward reaching to the heavens. Rarely has a collision between Christianity and rock had such a beautiful result like October.

Bono, The Edge, and Mullen had joined a Christian group in Dublin called the “Shalom Fellowship” around that time. The “Fellowship” was one of their main sources for spiritual energy and the members thrived upon the weekly prayer and Bible readings. However, while the band was touring between the time of Boy and October, a member of the satellite community of “Shalom” claimed to have a prophecy that God wanted the band to give up. When the band returned home for their encouragement from the group that they thrived upon, they were greeted with a split group deciding on whether or not the band should pack up their instruments.

To be a Christian and to find that you are a gifted musician brings forth certain questions and responsibilities. It is a mission field filled with temptations in drugs, sex, and materialism and is an easy place to lose your head with intoxication of fame or even lose your soul in trying to gain the world. This was the issue that the band was dealing with at the time of October. The parable of the talents in Matthew 25:14-30 was what helped the members decide on what to do with the dilemma that they were faced with. The lesson from the parable is that when you are given a gift, you have to use it. You have to deal with the responsibly and problems that come with it. You cannot run from it or hide it. You have to face the consequences of who you are and what your vocation is.

War
War (1983) brought forth a new face to U2, a political one. The previous two albums were their way of looking within themselves about their growth and development as followers of Christ and War was their way of turning the mirror from themselves to their home country, Ireland. Bono interrupted the craziness of U2's pre-Christmas gig in Belfast one night in 1982, three months before the release of War. The three thousand sell-out crowd watched as Bono climbed on top of anything he could to introduce the band's newest song. But in the introduction, the mood changed. The air became thin when Bono announced that the new song was about Northern Ireland. He was careful to point out that it was not a rebel song and if they didn't like it, Ur would never play it in Belfast again. However, by the end of “Sunday Bloody Sunday,” the crowd understood the true meaning and intention of the message.

“Sunday Bloody Sunday” was taken from “Bloody Sunday,” the name given to the two darkest days in Ireland bloody history. January 30, 1972, the day British troops shot and killed thirteen people during a civil rights march in Northern Ireland and November 21, 1921, the day that British troops entered the Gaelic Athletic Association and shot and killed twelve people. Even with the disguise of politics, “Sunday Bloody Sunday” has a Christian statement on War. Bono brings the words from the prophet Isaiah and the psalmist when they ask, “How long must we sing this song?” The same line is again brought up in the last song of the album titled “40” after Psalm 40.

“Sunday Bloody Sunday” has been one of the more emotional songs that U2 has ever written and became applicable once again on Ireland's Remembrance Sunday, November 8, 1987. The IRA set off a bomb at the War Memorial in Enniskillen. It is unknown whether the bomb was meant for British forces, but thirteen innocent people were killed. On the night of the bombing, U2 was performing a concert in Denver, Colorado. In the middle of “Sunday Bloody Sunday” Bono, emotional from the events of the day poured out his heart to the crowd, “Let me tell you something, I've had enough of Irish-Americans that haven't been back to their country in twenty or thirty years come to me and talk about the resistance, the revolution back home...and the glory of the revolution and the glory of dying for the revolution...fuck the revolution! They don't talk about the glory of killing for the revolution. What's the glory in taken a man from his bed and gunning him down in front of his wife and his children? Where's the glory in that? Where's the glory in bombing a Remembrance Day parade of old age pensioners, their medals taken out and polished up for the day. Where's the glory in that? To leave them dying or crippled for life or dead under the rubble of the revolution, that the majority of the people in my country don't want. No more!5” The band never played “Sunday Bloody Sunday” after that until the end of the Popmart tour ten years later because they never could escape that day in 1987.

When U2 brought the song back in 2001 for the Elevation tour, it became more of a celebration of the positive steps Northern Ireland had taken towards peace. Bono introduced it by saying “If you're Irish, you've got something to sing about on this song.”

The Joshua Tree
The Joshua Tree (1987) is arguably U2's finest moment. It was the album that finally brought them to the status of legends and is the album that is looked to as the U2 sound. The album connects antipathy towards America against the band's deep fascination with the country, its open spaces, freedom, and what it stands for. However, among all the tracks of the album, one song in particular has been misunderstood and ridiculed by the Christian community. “I Still Haven't Found” was a pivotal song in the band's artistic intention of the album but it was concluded by the Christian community that anyone who had not found what they were looking for, could not have found Christ.

“I Still Haven't Found” is a song determined to show us that Christians often hide behind masks. It wrestles with the idea that once someone makes the connection with Jesus Christ, he has arrived and immediately, all of the solutions to life's problems are handed to him. No more questions needed to asked-Jesus is the answer. Everything is now explained; there is nothing left to search for. “This view is built on a need for precision and perfection, which have always been enemies of art, which is all about coloring outside the lines.6” The song is about the reality that Jesus is a journey, not an arrival.

Although the band had written many songs with a Christian intent before they had never written a song with gospel roots like “I Still Haven't Found.” Bono, on numerous occasions, has introduced this song as being “a gospel song for the restless spirit.” The song was a concise creed of redemption: Jesus breaks the bonds, looses chains, carries the cross and all of our shame. The confession is followed by a clear statement of “I believe it.” The band, who had been condemned for not proclaiming the gospel and being ashamed of it, could not have more clearly expressed their beliefs than this song.

The feelings and emotions of the band in “I Still Haven't Found” can be seen in the attitude of Paul in Philippians. Even Paul could not find what he was looking for,

“Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead, I press on toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus...Brothers, join in imitating me, and keep your eyes on those who walk according to the example you have in us...But our citizenship is in heaven, and from it we await a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, who will transform our lowly body to be like his glorious body, by the power that enables him even to subject all things to himself. Therefore, my brothers, whom I love and long for, my joy and crown, stand firm thus in the Lord, my beloved.7”
-Philippians 3:12-4:1

Paul had to take the belief, then go where the belief would lead him. He had to live by faith. If Christians look at the past few years in Rwanda, Angola, Mozambique, Sarajevo, the Middle East, or even Belfast, they cannot say that those tragedies are what they are looking for. If they look within themselves at a church full of gossip, dry faith, and hypocrites, they cannot say that that is what they have been looking for either. Looking into their own lives of lies, pain, lust, abuse, selfishness, and other forms of sin, they cannot say that is what they are looking for. It is the realization that they haven't found what they were looking for that should draw them back to the hope of growing and developing a deeper faith in Christ. Bono told the LA Times around the time of Joshua Tree's release that,

“I think there was a certain uptightness to the first three albums...At one time, I thought you had to have all of the answers if you were going to write a song, so it was embarrassing to make a record that was filled with doubts and questions. Then I began to see that many artists who inspired me...had same feelings of awkwardness and spiritual confusion. I realize now it's OK to say you still haven't found what you're looking for.8”

It is the gift of grace, the fact that someone came to break our bonds and loose the chains and carry the cross of our shame. “I Still Haven't Found” is a perfect description for our imperfect faith, where we need to acknowledge that I believe in Christ and all He has done but I need to keep running.
U2: Grown Up

To this day, U2 still pounds out songs full of questions and praise, pushing the boundaries of their music skills and of their faith. Their newest album, No Line on the Horizon, has been called by Bono “gospel songs of the future.” U2 is still the same band they were when they started but have progressed and affected music like no other band ever has. In a recent Rolling Stone interview The Edge remarked,

“We're all changing. We're all growing up and we're all going through what you go through when you have families, when you have a big house and a dog, whatever. It's not like we're all living in the same flat anymore. But I think we all know that there's something kind of touched about the way the four of us interact musically. We've weathered so much stuff over the years that could well have broken up a group and we're still here. I think it's down to a number of factors. First off there's genuine friendship and regard personally between the four members of the band. We hang out together. We enjoy each other's company. We see each other on our break times as well as when we're working. It's not like I'm rushing to get out of the studio to see my friends. I'm in the studio with my friends. That's sort of unique. I think we all fully appreciate how special it is, how unique it is to still be making great music after so many years. We don't want to fuck up. It's too precious.9”

U2 has said that they will continue to create music and one can only assume that they will still have questions left unanswered. Their friendship is so unique among rock bands and these four Irish boys have become more like brothers rather than band members. The four will remain family until they die and continue to encourage each other to grow and although their faith has been challenged throughout the past few decades, they will continue to pursue the kingdom that is coming and make music in the process.

Prayer of Monday

Man versus himself.
Man versus machine.
Man versus the world.
Mankind versus me.
The struggles go on,
The wisdom I lack,
The burdens keep piling
Up on my back.
So hard to breathe,
To take the next step.
The mountain is high,
I wait in the depths.
Yearning for grace,
And hoping for peace.
Dear God...
Increase.

Praise God!

I love simple answers to prayer

Music

I've been hearing music everywhere lately. In people, nature, and Music Himself. It's beautiful.

Remembering why we celebrate St. Patty's

St. Patrick was born in Wales in 387. His father's name was Calpornius and his mother's name was Conchessa. He lived in a villa in the country. He was captured by a man named Niall of the Nine Hostages or as most people know him as Niall Naoi nGiallach. They took him to Ireland and sold him to a farmer who lived in Antrim.

The farmer's name was Milchu. Patrick minded sheep on a hill and sometimes he tended pigs. They say he wasn't looked after very well. Sometimes he ate the pig's swill to keep him alive. He prayed every night. Then one night he heard a voice. It was God. He was telling him he had to escape. He thought he was dreaming but God told him he wasn't. The voice said that there was a ship waiting for him in Port Laraige (Waterford). He had to walk there and that wasn't easy. He had to kill animals for food to stay alive. He survived and got there.

There was a ship waiting for him but it had a cargo of wolfhounds for France. Patrick asked the captain, "Is this boat heading for France?" The captain asked him, "Why are you in such a hurry". Then the captain said, "You're a slave and you want to escape". Patrick said, "Well actually, I am". Quickly the captain replied, "I'm not taking a slave in my boat". Patrick got off. The ship left the pier and suddenly the hounds went berzerk and they had to return quickly. They tried again and each time the hounds went mad. Patrick said, "If you let me on that boat I will make sure that the hounds will settle. The captain answered, "OK but if you're lying well throw you overboard". And surely the hounds calmed down as soon as Patrick boarded the ship. They stayed calm until they got to France. It took a longtime to get there around about six days. He was about 17 at this stage.

He got through it and eventually got back to Wales. He wasn't there long when again he heard the voice telling him to go back to Ireland to tell the Irish pagans all about Jesus. He realised then that he wanted to become a priest. It wasn't easy. He went back and started his training. He went to St.Martins Monastery in Tours, France to train. Then he went back to England. He met Pope Celestine. The Pope was very happy with him. Then Patrick told him the whole story including the voices. The Pope told him that it was definitely God. Patrick wasn't the first person to be sent to Ireland. But that person failed. His name was Pallaclius. He went to Ireland in 431.

Shortly afterwards Patrick returned to Ireland. He had some priests with him. It was Easter now. They got off the boat and headed inland. He camped at Slane. They decided they would light a fire. That night was a very special night for the Pagans. It was the beginning of growth and they were celebrating the coming of Spring. Unknown to him he had broken the law. Normally, the king, whose name was Laoghaire, would light the fire first and everybody would see it and then light theirs. Someone looked out and saw Patrick's fire and said, "Look that must be the king's fire". So they lit their fire and then everybody started lighting their fires. The king looked out and saw everybody's fire lit. He was furious. He shouted, "I didn't light my fire yet". So they went to the place where they thought the fire had started. They arrested all the foreigners including Patrick. They tried and tried and couldn't put the fire out, but only Patrick could do it because he had God on his side.

The chieftain Laoghaire didn't want to learn about God but he let Patrick speak. They were surprised how Patrick knew their language so well. Then Patrick picked up the shamrock and asked, "How many leaves are there?" They all said three. Then Patrick asked how many seeds were needed to make it. Someone said one. This is how he explained the Blessed Trinity, God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit. The chieftain let him preach to anybody who would listen to him. A pagan priest said, "I will follow him".

He travelled up the east coast to Strangford Lough. He went ashore at Kilough in Co. Down. He went north and built a small church. He moved on to Connacht and then to Munster. He spent sixty years in Ireland. During that time he consecrated 350 Bishops to follow his ways. He died on the 17th of March 493 in Sabhall in County Down. Patrick's name comes from the name Patricius meaning Father. Most people couldn't pronounce his name properly at that time in Ireland so they originally called him Catrige.

GLORIA IN TE DOMINE

Prayer

For the first time in my life, I give everything to You. Not just leftovers or even tithe, everything. Everything is Yours, I own nothing.

Gloria, In te Domine!

I've had this line from the U2 song stuck in my head for the past two days...I wish I sang it all the time.

Random Thought of Thursday

One of the best parts about being a Christian is that you get to be a missionary

Cheese and U2

I really like eating cheese while listening to U2

Ben

I definitely have the coolest best friend in the world

The Thread - Lessons from בראשית

God is alive. The creator of the universe, the all-knowing/all-powerful/always-present God, the One who’s Name is above all names, the untamed Lion, is living and active in our lives today. This is the God that is so full of existence that He can give existence away, can cause things to be, breathe life into the dust. He is truly beyond any description. You cannot have a good description of anything so vague. He is a God that cannot be proved but Who’s evidence is everywhere in our everyday lives. God is alive and God is good.

In response to God being God, man is man, and to be man is to be in sin. Mankind is dark. Genesis shows us this in the origins of sin (aka the “Fall of Man”) in chapter 3, “And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.” (KJV 3:6). Chapter 4 (the first recorded murder), “…and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.” (4:8) and the destruction of Sodom and Gomorrah in chapter 19, “And the men said unto Lot, Hast thou here any besides? Son in law, and thy sons, and thy daughters, and whatsoever thou hast in the city, bring them out of this place: For we will destroy this place, because the cry of them is waxen great before the face of the LORD; and the LORD hath sent us to destroy it.” (19:12-13). Mankind became so evil that God regretted even creating human beings, “And God saw that the wickedness of man was great in the earth, and that every imagination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil continually. And it repented the LORD that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart. And the LORD said, I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth; both man, and beast, and the creeping thing, and the fowls of the air; for it repenteth me that I have made them.” (6:5-7). It is apparent from Genesis that man is in need of a savior.

However God, being who He is, is at work behind all that is going on. It isn’t as apparent when you focus on individual chapters. In fact God seems crazy in some parts of the story, but when you take a step back and look at Genesis as a whole, it’s clear that God was present the whole time and He knew what He was doing. The Call of Abraham in Genesis 12 comes right after the Tower of Babel in chapter 11 to contrast man’s way with God’s way. The tower symbolizes all of the proud human attempts to attain salvation or heaven by their own strength. The story shows how we try to use our own skill and reason to create our own heaven. To this day we haven’t stopped building towers. All human towers come crashing down sooner or later. We try to reach the sky but end up doing just the opposite. Our ways are folly but the Divine’s are true. The Messiah is the perfect example. Think of how ridiculous the call of Abraham seems to human eyes. Yet that is God’s battle plan against evil-to pick one man, human just like the rest of us, and send him wandering through the wilderness with nothing but a promise. This is the beginning of the miracle known as the Jewish people. Their survival, transformation, and accomplishments through persecution, slavery, and genocide violate every known law of history and sociology.

Consider just one incident in Joseph’s story (Genesis 37-51). If one Egyptian tailor had not messed up on the thread of Joseph’s cloak, it would not have come apart in the hands of Potifer’s wife, who was then able to wrongly accuse Joseph of attempted rape and get him imprisoned, where he met Pharaoh’s butler and baker and interpreted their dreams, which would later bring him to Pharaoh to interpret his dream and save Egypt from famine. The grain, from which Joseph saved by prophesizing about saved his family who had sold him into slavery, when they became angry when he foretold their coming to Egypt. Generations later Egypt has numerous healthy slaves; awaiting Moses’ liberation, which would eventually bring forth many years of wandering, oppression, and King David who’s direct descendant would be a Jewish, son of a carpenter named Jesus. Consequently, we owe our salvation to a thread. God has a plan and is working throughout human history.

“And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to his purpose” (Romans 8:28). Providence is the obvious lesson from the long story of Joseph that can be applied to my life. Joseph explains it to his brothers in 50:20, “But as for you, ye thought evil against me; but God meant it unto good, to bring to pass, as it is this day, to save much people alive.” God writes straight with crooked lines. He used Satan, Judas, Pilate, and Caiaphas to crucify Christ and redeem the world. God has nothing but flawed instruments to work with and yet his symphonies are beyond anything we have ever conceived. God uses the weak, stupid, sinful, and flawed. Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, etc.-every one of them a spiritual failure and yet what makes them heroes is not their “great deeds” or their strength but their faith in the Almighty. Christ even continued to do the same with his disciples. They let God be God and had faith. Abraham believed that God would even bring Isaac back from the dead in Genesis 22.

A common misunderstanding about God in the Old Testament is that he is only a God of wrath. God is indeed a God of justice and punishment, but love is his motivation behind it all. Love is just as evident throughout Genesis as it is in the Gospel of John. We see the faith that Abraham has in his Creator, but we also see the faith the Creator has in His Abraham. The six days of creation are as if they were sung with love, like the Great Lion singing Narnia into existence. We are shown the love and care that went into creating those six days through six words, ”…God saw that is was good.”

Genesis ends with the chosen people in slavery, but it also ends with hope. No book is more severe and no book is more hopeful than the Bible, from Genesis on. God remains true. Genesis destroys our illusion of pride, if we let it. It is completely bountiful in Love Himself. You cannot read it without being changed, if you let it interpret you before you interpret it.

I...

really hate this time of year. Valentines day brings out the worst in me...and the movies suck too.

Astronomy

...is freakin awesome man

From My Train Ride...

I’ve been on this train for the past thirteen hours and this is the first time that I’m actually alone. We’re about three hours away from Oregon and about sixteen hours away from Portland, my home. It’s been a long time since I’ve been to Oregon. I left early on in the Summer to come down to California to spend some time with friends of our family and to start to move my things. There are many things that I don’t miss, like the constant rain. However, there are many things that I do miss, like my family and friends. I’ve met many wonderful people down here at Biola and made friends with them but I miss a lot of my friends back home. As I’m thinking of this I’m also thinking of Paul and how much he must have missed his friends. It seems like Paul was always either on the move or in prison and I can’t imagine how lonely he must have gotten at times. I’m sure he was comforted by many people (as well as the holy spirit) but with all that traveling, you tend to miss the people who matter most to you.
For the past two to three years I’ve thought a lot about my future and what I should do. God’s always had a funny way of revealing His plan for me. In the past it’s always started out as an idea and then through a series of events became more and more clear about what He wants me to do. Coming to Biola was a big one. I thought about Biola when I was in second grade. I had a teacher that is an alumni which sparked my interest. As I got older I still was interested in Biola but didn’t know what I wanted to do. It wasn’t until my sophomore year when I decided that I wanted to do something in film because of a class that I got randomly put in to. Shortly after that I found out about Biola’s CMA department and three years later, here I am.
Now, God is still revealing to me what he wants me to do in the future. I want to do missions work in Western Europe. This may seem like a random thing that I‘m talking about, but it has a point. If I were to move to Western Europe to do missions work I would be traveling all the time, working with different churches or groups…just like Paul. Philippians is meaningful to me because I want to travel as Paul did someday. And this book gives me an idea about the loneliness I may face.
I’m really enjoying this train ride. It’s over thirty hours long but it’s been beautiful. I woke up from a nap early on in the day to find that we were riding right along the coast. We’ve gone through mountains, went through the desert at sunset, and the stars are everywhere. I’ve done a lot of looking out the window while listening to music. I’ve been reading from CS Lewis’s The Four Loves mainly the part about friendship. I agree with Lewis when he talks about how strange friendship really is because it’s totally not necessary to live. Friendship (philia, φιλια) is a strong bond existing between people who share a common interest or activity. Lewis explicitly says that his definition of friendship is narrower than mere companionship: friendship in his sense only exists if there is something for the friendship to be "about". He calls Companionship a matrix for friendship, as friendship can rise in the context of both. Friendship is the least natural of loves, states Lewis; i.e., it is not biologically necessary to progeny like either affection (e.g., rearing a child), eros (e.g., creating a child), or charity (e.g., providing for a child). It has the least association with impulse or emotion. In spite of these characteristics, it was the belief of the ancients, (and Lewis himself), that it was the most admirable of loves because it looked not at the beloved (like eros), but towards that "about"--that thing because of which the relationship was formed. This freed the participants in this friendship from self-consciousness. Because the more they were looking towards something beyond or above themselves, the more those who were looking towards that thing with them were welcomed with the same sincerity, which freed the relationship from jealousy. And although the love may not be biologically necessary, it has, argued Lewis, civilization value. The thing beyond or above themselves may be of monumental importance to society. But without the benefit of friendship to blunt the loneliness of "being the only person who sees this", or the idea that two heads are better than one, many advances in society may never have been embarked upon. The relationship is by its nature selective, and therefore, exclusive. This characteristic is not detrimental per se, but the idea or goal towards which friends strive need not be altruistic. The innocuous ideas may simply be the cause of pseudo-aristocracies that ignore the legitimate cries of those outside their group; the malefic ones may be quite worse.
I've loved the time to relax and think about whatever God put on my mind. Friendship was the big topic that I was thinking about because I was going home to see my friends but I was also missing my new friends at Biola. I just liked that there was nothing I had to do and there was nobody around and how beautiful the train ride has been. I don’t know if there’s anything that I would’ve done differently. This was the first time I’ve ever done this and haven’t got distracted. I do this kind of thing every once in awhile and I know I’ll probably do it again. I enjoy being alone (not as much as I enjoy being around people) it’s a different kind of experience. There are so many times when I don’t really pay attention to what’s going on around me because I’ve got so much going on. It’s times like these when I can really just listen.

Broken Despair

Nobody knows what hope is anymore. We think we do but really we just settle for the watered-down, easy way out version. So often we go through life not even caring. "I can never achieve joy so why even try? I'll pursue happiness because at least that is attainable." I've always hated that part in the Declaration of Independence. "...life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness." Why are we settling for something cheap? Something that is worth far less than what we're meant to have? I love The Lord of the Rings because even though when all hope is lost, they fight on without it. The world is coming to an end and instead of giving in they continue to fight until they are dead. We aren't even in situations like that and we do the opposite, we abandon all hope and the worst part of all is that we don't even realize we're doing it. It's so easily cured too. Despair can be broken by something as simple as a sunrise, or a glance at the night's sky, or dare i say it...a child. How many children do we see just trying to get by in life? How many children have no hope? Even in the worst situations a child is never without hope. Why can't we be like that?

How?

How do you you start a fire in a world that refuses to be lit?

Education President

Due to my lack of things to do in the last few weeks, I have started watching The West Wing again (not that I'm complaining). In light of a recent discussion that I've had with a friend and also considering that in a few days a new president will be taking charge I thought that now would be a appropriate time to talk about my views on politics and what a president should be. If you know me well enough you know that I hate politics so actually writing something that has to do with it is a risky move for me. I truly believe that the perfect form of government is a monarchy however, that would also require the perfect King and to my knowledge we don't let Him rule a whole lot. However in this country, if you haven't heard, we make due with a president which is not nearly the same as a king. Putting aside what I think a government should be, I would like to address what I think a president should be (or at least part of what I think they should be). A president should be...dare I say it...smarter than me (which I know is a stretch). In 8 years of Bush's presidency I have yet to be impressed with anything he has said. To be fair Obama isn't very "impressive" either. They both seem like average guys, which is the problem. I don't want a president who is an average guy. I want a genius. I want somebody like Churchill or President Bartlet. I don't get why the people of the united states of america want a president who will "dumb down" his words for people like you and me to understand. Bartlet says in season three "It's not our job to appeal to the lowest common denominator. It's our job to raise it. If you're going to be the 'Education President,' it'd be nice not to hide that you have an education."



(This is just the start of hopefully many posts to come on the subject...more will probably come as I continue to watch the show)

Ben...

Let's go to Portland this weekend

What Grinds My Gears...

people that make martyrs of themselves

My two favorite people in the whole wide world

Oregon reminds me of Middle Earth sometimes...sometimes

wish/thought

I wish i could grOW A FREAKING BEARD!!!